June 2010

1. I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell - Tucker Max
2. The Secret of Platform 13 - Eva Ibbotson
3. Matilda - Roald Dahl
4. Julie & Julia - Julie Powell
5. James and the Giant Peach - Roald Dahl
6. Anne of Green Gables - L. M. Montgomery

I must say that my fourth year children's lit class is the best course I've ever taken... ever. Which is depressing considering I'm far from a Lit major, and used to turn my nose up at those who were. I mean - why study books when you can simply read them? After getting my hands dirty with this class in particular, however, I realized that BECAUSE I love books so much, I SHOULD be interested in studying them. Oh and how!

Although only one of these books - Anne of Green Gables - was on the syllabus for my course, I couldn't help but delve into other old favourites. Although Dahl is a quick and easy read, my god he is a genius! The only two "adult" books I read this month were non-fiction, which I am growing extremely fond of. Allow me...

*****

1. Alright, so I've had a discussion with a friend of mine (girl) over this book who claims her boyfriend (boy... obviously) loved it. She, however, did not. She told me she could barely get through the first story. Let me elucidate: this book was, like most nowadays, a collection of stories written on a blog for the initial entertainment of the author's friends and family (though in this case, perhaps not family after all). Tucker Max writes about his outrageous, obscene and abnormally offensive adventures... not well, mind you, but hilariously. I found myself bursting out in snorts every other story or so (short and sweet, good for a work break read), and couldn't help but read whole passages aloud. Though this collection is by no means a Pulitzer, it has its amazing moments, and you know what? If it makes me laugh, I buy it. I strongly suggest being a man (or at least, like me, having penis envy) before picking this one up!

On a side note, I found a copy of the movie adaptation, and it was surprisingly candid and well-done. It can't possibly capture the enormity of shitstardome the book does, but it purposely mellows out Tucker's stories in a way that makes a very cohesive film. I recommend it, although maybe only after you've read the book (or else I'd assume it would appear unneccessarily nasty).
8.5/10

2. Cute novel, very well written, interesting concept - although after devouring the Harry Potter series 10+ times as a child and an adult, this quirky book came up a little dry. But what can you expect? Not every fantasy children's novel is Harry bloody Potter.
7/10

3 & 5. I'm fusing the two Dahl books together as they are both short, sweet and tremendous fun. One can't help but read these books with huge smiles on their faces. Immediately after reading these, I watched their movie counterparts - all which are supremely decent considering Dahl's imagination was a far-fetched one. Why should I even recommend these books? If you haven't read them already, I won't be surprised if you've never left your cave.
10 DAHL STARS out of 10 because you can't compare his to anyone else.

4. I actually bought this book for my mom when she insisted on reading it shortly after watching the movie (ew, Meryl Streep). I then, as I do most items I generously give as gifts to my parents, borrowed it. It has been on my bookshelf for a month, though I do plan on returning it as my mom never did get the chance to read it. NOT BAD I must say, as the movie was a slight dud, and the material never interested me to begin with. Just to say, the narrator is actually much less annoying than the character Amy Adams plays in the film. She is spunky and bitchy and human and it is nice to be able to relate to other women who have no idea what they are good for in life. Also, I love food, and descriptions of food are like porn to me.
7/10

6. I REALLY didn't want to read this book. It was the first set in the curriculum for my online children's literature course, and I'd never liked the made-for-TV series, and had never dusted off the second-hand copies I kept in my room. Luckily, I was very wrong and very dumb with my anxieties. Although yes, the book is dated, and yes it is sexist and has all sorts of politically incorrect (in today's standards) ideals, but GOSH DARN IT was it fun. I hadn't read such a joyful novel in a long time - and here Dahl's do not count, as usually something horrible is always going on in his. Anne, on the other hand, gives off such a positive vibe that I'd be amazed if someone (especially a hetero and non-defensive-feminist female) didn't like it. It is gender-based literature, the first I've read in fact, but I felt as though I were transported back to the late 1880s in good ole Prince Edward Island. You know... come to think of it, I've never met an unhappy ginger...
9/10

May 2010

If I suggested that the month of April was horrible, I can't go into words about the month of May. On the bright side, I was so incredibly busy with starting a new job and my new classes that I can barely remember the past month. It went by sooo fast - which is probably why I only got through three books. I'm going to dash through this post as I really really should get back to my 2-weeks worth of unfinished homework...

1. Half Magic - Edward Eager
2. Fables: 1001 Nights of Snowfall - Bill Willingham
3. The Namesake - Jhumpa Lahiri

*****

1. I'm unclear as to how many people I know have actually read Edward Eager. I picked this little book up at my parents house in preparation for my Children's Lit class. As opposed to the previous month's dud, I was able to fully appreciate and engage in this wonderfully nostalgic novel about children, a magic coin, and everything magic happening in halves. Now, I've never been a fan of math - but you don't need to be in order to love this book. In fact, soon after finishing the last page, I promptly logged on to Amazon.ca and discovered Eager had written many more books than just the 2 that I had at my parents' house. AKA I'm on it!
9/10

2. This prequel to the groundbreaking comic series "Fables" is beautifully illustrated and cleverly written. Again, this time in response as opposed to prelude for my Children's Lit class, I devoured this graphic novel within minutes. Seriously, you don't have to have any prior knowledge of the main series at all. You just have to let yourself go and appreciate the fairy tales in this story, new/old/retold that are fantastical and wonderful.
9.5/10

3. Finally, "The Namesake." I bought this novel a long time ago at Powell Books in Portland after watching the movie, but had left it on my shelf for a very long time. In May I decided to start reading it during my breaks at work. It took me a rather long time to finish - not solely because I was only getting half-hour sessions, but because it is written so descriptively and carefully that you can't miss a single word on a single page for fear of throwing off the entire flow of the story. Even if at times I felt the incredible amount of detail and absence of dialogue more-or-less daunting, I grew accustomed to it quickly, and was then able to enjoy it for what it was. If you read the first page you will quickly understand what I mean.
8/10

April 2010

So I've been doing homework for my two online courses for pretty much the past day and a half non-stop (not counting sporadic periods of Sex and the City watching... but hello! I have to train my roommate). I finally decided my brain will explode soon, so I might as well take a break... to write about books! The month of April was hands down the Worst. Ever. And when I say bad, I'm not over-exaggerating in a "woe-is-me my life is sooo hard" kind of way. But we won't get into that! I still managed to digest some literature through all the major hardshit (har har). Here they are:

1. Whose Panties Are These? - Jennifer L. Leo
2. Percy Jackson & The Lightening Thief - Rick Riordan
3. Just After Sunset - Stephen King
4. The Customer is Always Wrong - Jeff Martin

*****

1. So after reading Paul Theroux in March, I went on a "I'm only going to read non-fiction from now on" kick. This, obviously didn't last long (I thank my semi-ADHD brain). This first collection, however, is indeed non-fiction. More so chick-lit non-fic, but nonetheless. It was relatively entertaining, in particular if you love reading those "Embarrassing Stories" in magazines such as Cosmo, since the entire novel is composed of dozens of stories written by... female writers. I appreciated them even more so as they took place in random destinations around the world. Oh if only I could become a travel-writer. Though I'm not sure I would publish documentation of the shit I get myself into...
7/10

2. Okay, please, simmer down. I only read this first Percy Jackson book as a prelude to my online Children's Lit class, though I quickly realized that I wouldn't be reading anything quite as shit. I was DEEPLY disappointed, especially since I truly wasn't expecting a Harry Potter knockoff. How can such a successful series-turned-into-movie be a COPYCAT of one of the most prestigious series for children ever??! Answer me that! This book was hardly even entertaining since I was constantly comparing every character and event to those in the HP series. Can I just stop thinking about this now? ...It wasn't even written well! The only thing I can sincerely hope for is that the author was targeting a much, much younger and less literate audience.
5/10

3. I don't think I've actually read an entire Stephen King novel, though I've seen many of the movie adaptations (as most humans have). Anyway, I'd started this short story collection a loooong time ago, but like "Acid House" for some reason I put it down and forgot to pick it back up. Which is CONFUSING because both books were aweome! In King's collection, I found maybe 1/3 of all the stories I didn't think much of, but the rest were highly entertaining, well plotted and well written. Which I guess is signature of Stephen King for those of you who have actually read his other novels. From now on, I swear to read all of his books that I own (a surprisingly large amount).
8.5/10

4. And finally... the book that every single being who has ever worked in retail has wanted to write. Heck, I'm jealous! I love how all the stories in this book are written by *writers* who have had to work in retail at some point in their lives. Its hilarious and depressing how familiar some of these stories are to me, as I can imagine they are to anyone else who has experienced the horrors and wonders of retail. Read this book if you want a laugh or are bitter at your current job.
8/10

March 2010

1. Ghost Train to the Eastern Star - Paul Theroux

*****

Sadly, for some reason this month - whether it be laziness on my part, or the fact that I've been working/writing term papers a lot more than usual - I only managed to finish one book. Happily... it was one damn good book. It was also nice to realize that I would take reading one insanely inspiring and entertaining novel over five or six half-decent slash straight shitty ones just for the numbers. Numbers aren't everything kids. Tell that to Ron Jeremy.

For the record, I am currently on a non-fiction kick since the last few fiction novels I've read have only led to headaches and manic sobbing. It's truly astonishing how some people get published whilst others do not (cough me, if I had actually written a manuscript and/or sent work in to a publisher, but no big deal). After this book in particular, Ghost Train to the Eastern Star by Paul Theroux, I am well on my way to getting through all those travel books my dad has recommended. In fact, it was him who lent me this book, and for good reason.

Paul Theroux is, apparently, a huge tool, as are most writers of the 20th century... or EVER, for that matter. His writing, however, is addictive. The book is about his trip from London, England through Hungary, the Stans, India, South East Asia, Tokyo and a train trip across the vast lands of Russia. Da? He, in his 60s if I'm correct, wanted to re-do his previous trip of the same concept from back in 1973, when he was much younger and when the world had different political issues and otherly-placed massacres of innocent civilians. In '73 he hadn't been granted permission to enter Cambodia, where the Khmer Rouge splattered blood and land mines over the soil, and this time he wasn't able to get a visa for Iran, Pakistan or Afghanistan (and for good reason).

Honestly, fuck university. I learned more history (and retained it) in this 500 page travel account than I have in 17 years of bilingual education. Who knew that Turkmenistan (at least back in 2006 when the book was written), even existed, let alone was run by an insane and egotistical maniac Niyazov who named himself Turkmenbashi, and changed the days of the week and the names of the months to the names of his parents? Or who erected huge gold statues of himself while relocating thousands of citizens in the process? Who knew that most Vietnemese have either totally disregarded any thought of their war with America, and even the older locals have absolutely no visible tension with any U.S. citizen? Maybe I just haven't been paying attention to any of those ASIA 100 and 101 lectures, but I had no idea how the numbers of innocent people killed and murdered and sent to prison camps and tortured in Cambodia and Vietnam easily outdo those of the Holocaust.

It may be biased, but many places Theroux visits are documented with such detail and emotion that I started to base my own biases on his. I now have absolutely no intention of ever setting foot in Singapore so i can be flogged for accidentally showing my breast while intoxicated, or spitting on the sidewalk while engaging in an exciting conversation. I by no means want to travel to Thailand, even if it's beautiful. I don't desire watching fourteen year old girls prostituting themselves at the hands of lecherous aged Western men on vacation. In fact, I'm going to go so far as to say Japan even lost some of its appeal. I am, however, rabid at the thought of picking my way through India, Sri Lanka and Vietnam. Hell, I wouldn't mind visiting Turkmenistan. AND TURKEY. Istanbul has always fascinated me, and Theroux's account did even more.

What I loved about this book was the very human way in which it was written. It wasn't a travel guide or journal. I thought Anthony Bourdain's food-take of third-world countries was groundbreaking, and had no idea Theroux was one of the initial ground breakers from which every other travel author has been inspired. In almost every country, Paul Theroux would mention the books he read along the way, all of them extremely relevant to the places he was at. I did this in Kyoto, even though the book I read was a Westernized historical fiction of geishas (you know which one I'm talking about), and am planning on devouring Hunter Thompson's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas where I hope to venture on my 21st birthday this coming July.

Ghost Train opened new insights for me. I currently have in my possession Theroux's original travel adventure: The Great Railway Bazaar, and am excited to see how drastically all the countries have changed in the past 30 years. To see what the Stans were like back then. To see if Japan really hasn't changed, but the people have indeed gotten weirder.

I too, one day wish to be a ghost traveler scribbling notes as I watch Ashgabat and Galle and Hanoi rush by my train window. Maybe someday soon I'll grow up, leave everything behind and write my way through the Eastern Star.

10/10

February 2010

This list is very much overdue - I apologize. You know when your brain is set to automatic procrastination? That's the default mine's been stuck on for the entire month of March. Anyway - moving on to my February book list... As this February ended on the 28th, I didn't get through all that many books (actually, that's a pathetic excuse. I doubt I would've read any more than half a novel in three days). But here they are in order of read-y-ness (?).

1. The Sex Life of Food - Bunny Crumpacker
2. Pygmy - Chuck Palahniuk
3. The Acid House - Irvine Welsh
4. Drink Play F@#k - Andrew Gottlieb
5. The Walking Dead #1 - Kirkman/Moore
6. The Umbrella Academy #1 - Gerard Way/Gabriel Ba

*****

1. This book was pretty awesome. Although I might question the author's sources (there was no bibliography or source section at all, and she was referencing some pretty heavy assumptions), the details and information in this food-gasm non-fic were pretty nom-able. Like many food related novels I've picked up throughout my life, I found this one extremely appealing in it's food descriptions. Ranging from cannibalism, Hitler's sex life, sex in the kitchen and vegetarianism, the book covered most all bases that can be related to food and sex (together). Interesting read! I'd recommend it.
7.5/10

2. Unfortunately, this Chuck is not going to get any of my thumbs. In fact, the only appendage it may merit is my middle finger. Sorry, Pal, but this was possibly your worst book. The premise: an adolescent covert terrorist spy sent from an American-hated country takes refuge in an exchange program in a town in the USA. A plot to eventually wipe out the entire country is set into place, and Pygmy, the main terrorist, along with his other terrorist buddies infiltrate this small community. Yeah! I know, it sounds wicked. The way in which it is written, however, is NOT. Documented in short, militaristic preposition-missing sentences, it took me over FOUR MONTHS to actually get through this book. Even though the chapters were short, I found myself pausing after every one of them, sometimes having to return to the start just to try and grasp what the hell was going on. I can see where Chuck was potentially trying to go, but it did not work. Stay away from this book - especially if you are a fan of this author. Oh yeah, and the ending was a complete cop-out.
3.5/10

3. Okay, this novel did what "Pygmy" could not: introduce a foreign and practically incomprehensible dialogue onto the page and expect the reader to understand. Irvine Welsh was able to achieve this since his use of blatant Scottish accent-written prose was fluid, familiar, and not employed consistently without breaks. It probably also helped that the book is composed of a number of short stories, which I'm a huge fan of. Again, this book took me a while to get through, but I enjoyed every story and thought in the end that it was a work of genius. Well worth learning Scottish idioms.
8.5/10

4. Another disappointing book that I almost wish I hadn't wasted time and money with. I bought this book mainly because it is a parody of a book I enjoyed very much: Eat, Pray, Love. And like most things I admire, I admire more if there is a good satire about it. Sadly, this comedian author has nothing on Chelsea Handler or Whoopi. The pages dragged on and on and on and holy shit it took one VERY long stint on the can for me to finally finish the book. Do I even have to comment on it? AGAIN, another very good premise with lots of potential... but not able to meet (anywhere near) in the middle.
2.5/10

5. The first graphic novel of the month! Yay! For some odd reason February was my month for zombie obsession. And trust me, I've always been a fan of horror, but never of zombie movies. I find that zombies attract 12 year old boys and/or adolescent stoners. And yet, my boyfriend wanted to test out his new 28 Days Later Blu-Ray (shit quality, sorry to disappoint). I'd seen the movie before, but this time - even with the low transfer HD quality, I got really into it. So once I got home I scoured my roommate's extensive zombie movie collection and picked out a few. Continuing with this theme, I noticed a graphic novel the previous roommate had left behind: The Waking Dead. I gave it a shot, and AMAZINGLY, I loved it. In fact, I can almost vouch that this graphic novel was better than any of the zombie movies I'd been watching. Well written, cleverly detailed, great plot line. I mean... what more can you ask for? And what more could REALLY turn me into a 12 year old comic zombie myself?
9/10

6. Lastly, my second graphic novel of the month of February: Umbrella Academy. I bought this book on Amazon awhile ago after reading the synopsis - honestly, I'm a sucker for anything remotely "The Incredibles".... in fact, I quite feel like watching it now... Anyway. This one has been sitting on my shelf collecting dust for no reason at all. So I read it. And was confused. The writer is the lead singer from My Chemical Romance - an old emo band I loathed back in high school and still blame for all those theatre losers I had to deal with in class. Understandably, you can see why I was a little hesitant to start reading. And for semi-good reason. Although the art was amazing/magnificent/fantastically good, the plot was a little spotty and the story was wonky. Which may have been the entire point, but so sue me if I'm a conservative comic nerd - I like my structure! Still though... I'm mainly confused because somehow Gerard Way (and of course the incredible artist) managed to pull it off! And because of this I can confidently say that I'd read more.
7/10

January 2010

Welcome to my first ever book-recording blog post!
This was the month that got it all started. Probably in reaction to the amount of books purchased and received around Christmastime, January is usually the month that involves the most reading consumption of the year. Thankfully this past January was no exception!
Although I always have a pile of unfinished, half-read books waiting to be completed, I always find myself picking up the freshest, newest, most untouched book in my room. I was surprised then, when reflecting back on my readings, to discover that most of the books I read this month were ones that had been lying around for quite some time. If I keep this up then maybe, just maybe, I'll get through my whole collection one day.

P.S. I don't believe in libraries.

*****

(In photo order, not reading order)

1. Y The Last Man Deluxe Edition Volume 1 -- Brian K. Vaughan and Pia Guerra
2. Y The Last Man Deluxe Edition Volume 2 -- Brian K. Vaughan and Pia Guerra
3. Yakitate! Japan Volume 5 -- Takashi Hashiguchi
4. The Wealthy Barber -- David Chilton
5. Watchmen -- Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons
6. The Female Brain -- Louann Brizendine M. D.
7. The Mammoth Book of Best New Manga -- Ilya
8. Stuff White People Like -- Christian Lander
9. The History of Lucy's Love Life in Ten and a Half Chapters -- Deborah Wright

*****

1. & 2. These two volumes are the compilation omnibuses (omnibi?) of the graphic novel Y The Last Man. The writer eventually got chosen to write for the television series Lost, which I still can't define as good or horribly, horribly wrong, but I digress. This is an AMAZING series, for any of you graphic novel/comic nuts. The storyline is engaging and believable, and the art is detailed and clean. A mustmustMUST not miss. P.S. It is much cheaper to buy the big volumes for $20 on amazon.ca then to buy each individual book at $10 each.
8.5/10

3. Again part of a comic series (this time Japanese manga), this is a boy's manga about a kid who has "Gauntlets of the Sun" for hands, meaning the temperature of his hands is perfect for kneading and baking dough. Yes this is a manga about FOOD and bread.
Although the first few books were gripping and filled with detailed illustrations of perfectly shaped food, this volume was slightly underwhelming. It could be because I had sort of lost the thread of the series, not having read it for at least eight months. Only warning I have if you're willing to start this one: it's a long fuckin' ride. There are at least 23 volumes, so if you're not ready to commit, I say leave this series for now. There's also an anime of it, so I'll probably just watch that.
6.5/10

4. The Wealthy Barber! Aha, a book I actually felt smart after reading. This little book I got for free months ago at VanCity. In an attempt to sort out my finances, I decided I might as well read it. I recommend this to many people, mainly because it is written in an extremely simple way. In regards to the relativity of the information... well, it's no longer 1989, and anyone with half a brain knows it costs a helluva lot more to buy property in Vancouver in the 21st century than it did back in the 80's in Toronto. Also, mutual funds, as my financial-genius father has brought to my attention, are no longer wise investments unless you are looking at an extremely lengthy stay. Read this book! It's probably free at your bank, and makes you sound smart when your friends start whining to you about how they're flat broke.
8/10

5. Do I even have to state the obvious? Really. It took me way too long to finally get my hands on this, but it was beyond worth it. What I thought might be hype was in fact all legit. And you know what? The movie wasn't half bad either, although I don't know how anyone who hadn't read the book managed to sit through it.
9/10

6. Ya! I read a psychology book during my free time! This one's cool because it explains away all the psychotic tendencies of females. The writer/doctor also blames absolutely everything from bitchy moods to postpartum on HORMONES. I knew we had no control over this!
I'm assuming the sources of the book are backed up, due to the half-book index and bibliography at the end. This is a quick, knowledgeable and relatively easy read that you should buy for your boyfriends and fathers.
7.5/10

7. Big comic book collections are always cool since they feature an array of different authors and styles and stories. This one was decent, but a few years ago I stumbled upon one that was way more diverse. Still, if you're looking to get started on some manga, pick this guy up and start researching.
6/10

8. Of course. The blog turned book. Oh I hate you and am deeply jealous. I originally bought this book in Portland (har har, inside book joke) for my boyfriend (who incidentally, doesn't read AT ALL. I'm still choked, but trying to get over this fact), but realizing he would never read it, started it myself. It's very witty, fast-paced and TRUE. Sometimes the truth in it is hysterical. And although I wouldn't associate every one of his postings to an actual white person (and see, I can be minorly objective as I'm only half, and thus a minority and not WHITE per se), I can definitely associate them with all hipsters of the world.
In my half "white" person defense - Portland, Oregon and rock climbing can be enjoyed by people of any race!
7/10

9. Oh geez, chick lit. I honestly bought this book because it was on the $5 table at Chapters on my way out. It looked cheesy and cliche and total crap, but I bought it anyway because it was fucking five bucks and had the words "Time machine" and "dating life" on it. And yes, the protagonist finds a time machine, goes back in time, and bones as many literary, artistic and social masters of the past. Including Lord Byron, Casanova, etc. etc.
This book was GENIUS. I tell you. For chick lit (and unfortunately I've read a fair amount), the writing is impressive, the story is slick and very original, and there are minute sex scenes that are wicked. Not Pam Anderson's "Star" wicked, but no one can quite beat that.
I recommend this little known, CHEAPLY priced (at Chapters) book to any girl who wants a five hour beach read and a giggly boy discussion afterward. My only qualms of this novel was the ending, which was a little rushed and slightly far-fetched. But a time machine is involved, so I guess that's expected.
9/10 (Yea, it gets as much as Watchmen! I'm a chick, stfu.)